He pinky-promised :)

I was driving from work 2 days ago, when i saw pretty rainbow.
I know that God was speaking to me, i suddenly feel LOVED!
I can hear His promises in my ears, that He's holding me.

G: "Everything's gonna be allright, na..."
n: Thank you God... :)

" i don't have a god i can hold in my hands
i have a God whose holding me."

*blushed*

Mean Girl

That’s how I see myself these couple of days.
I hate it :(
I don’t know what to do, what to say or how to act.

BRAVE FACE(polinar) © 2008

i put on a brave faceevery time i see you and you're with her
everybody tells me that you and me will never work
i have come to terms with this somehow
i'm ok but there's still a part of me that wants to hear you saying that you love me
saying that you love me now
i look for cues i search for signs
anything that would make me feelmore than fine
but then i get tired of trying to be inspired
i'll just to have accept that you're moving on, moving on, moving on...

:( Help me God, I need You…
Give me enough love and grace to be sincere, enough strength and power to move on
bring me back to You...
Psalm 34:18
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit
*flushed*

You've got tag!

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

I’ve been tagged on Facebook, I thought I share a lil bit of myself:
1. I miss my parents everyday T.T and absolutely hate the fact that I’m 8708 miles away from them T.T
2. Even though I think I’m quite careful, I get cuts and bruises daily. I hate sharp edges, I think they all should just be round and friendly :], just like my drawings :]
3. I like the number 7 and 8, but nothing superstitious: I have my own reasons. Btw, nana is 7 in Japanese :]
4. I feel like I’m under-develop - -“ if I have 3 wishes it’ll be to have a longer chin, longer fingers and to be taller!
5. I always wanted to have a big brother, but now I just wish I have siblings :[, any will do. But i think God provide my need through friends :] best friends!
6. I can’t make decision, most of the time indecisive. Not that I don’t care but I just don’t mind.
7. I haven’t found any allergies or any food that I don’t like yet :9 I enjoy eating good food with a good view. I love checking yelp out for a good review on restaurants. Highly recommending: Gary Danko!
8. I like colors that are “ga jelas” and adore details on things, for example: lil button, or ruffles on the edges will make me go awwwww…
9. I hate reptiles and bugs and scary movies. They creep me out…
10. I used to be afraid of dogs, but now I wish I could have a bichon or old-english sheepdog, maybe someday I will.
11. I love to sing! and have a thing for musicians, i think they're cool :9
12. I don't believe in love at first sight.
13. I am a cheapo and proud to be one! :D I love freebies and deals and coupons and vouchers and discounts. Disclaimer: I’m NOT stingy.
14. It’s really hard to identify my favorites, because apparently I have lots of favorites (I have lots of paling suka!)
15. I like early spring, because that’s the time when my favorite tree is blooming, I can seriously say my favorite in this case :p
16. I’m a sucker for dimples. I don’t have dimples myself, but my car does :p
17. I love the smell of laundry <3>
18. I think babies are supposed to be chubby. But regardless I think babies are just adorably cute!
19. I cried when miso (my bunny) pooped for the 1st time. But now: I’m attached! I love you miso hot.
20. I love the sky, the one thing that I never get bored of. I like how blue the sky is and how fluffy the cloud is. I feel loved whenever i see the ray of sun breaking through the clouds. My jaw would drop everytime rainbow appear on the sky. I’m amazed on how stars and moon enjoying each other’s company. How great is our GOD!
21. I can’t multitask while driving - -“ I miss exits, etc etc…
22. I hate goodbyes. Enuf said.
23. I am a hopeless romantic, I like watching romantic comedies, and wouldn’t mind watching it again even though I watched it before. I like watching korean/japanese drama. I like reading comics/anime. It’s my escape from reality.
24. I LOVE everything disney, I think they should hire me for promoting them or you know give me a free pass because I went there like really often and I’m not even in so-cal. I enter the sweepstakes all the time but never win :( Everything there just excites me. It is indeed the happiest place on earth! And I think one of the best gifts I ever gotten is 6 days tickets to disneyworld! Wouldn’t mind getting it again *hint hint* :9
25. and I am forever grateful for the cross. I can’t imagine my life without Jesus :] It is truly the greatest gift of all *blushed*

thank you for reading all the way to the bottom.. :]
Gosh! I wish I can do more than 25 :9

thank You...

Just a little while longer I wanna pray
Can't get You off my mind so I came to say:
Thank You Lord just for loving me
Many times as I do forget
Every need that You have met
Oh thank You Lord, I know You're showing me
You are there when I am down and out
You're holding me, Your love is so amazing
Oh it changed me

Here I am with all I am
Raise my hands to worship You
I wanna say thank you, oh thank you
For everything, for who You are
You cover me, You touch my heart
I wanna say thank you

I could have died in my sin but You saved me
Didn't have any hope at all
You gave me peace divine, strength to carry on
I should have been the one to pay
But instead You took my place
My Jesus, words cannot explain
Even though I don't deserve Your love for me
You look beyond my fault and You showed mercy

I wanna say thank you for the sun
I wanna say thank you for the rain
Everything You do is beautiful
I'm so grateful for Your love

*deep sigh*
*blushed* :`)

Too Blessed to be Stressed!

Hafta always, keep reminding myself on that phrase.
I'm feelin a lil' down again... :(
but again God has opened up my eyes and heart to my surrounding *blushed*
whatever I'm going thru right now is absolutely nothing to be complained about
Things are definitely not going my way now, but I hope it's going on God's way

I thank you for friends who share encouraging stories and a God who never give up on me :)
How can i give up on Him then...
*blushed* completely...

Learning to love, actually

I never thought I’d would struggle this much learning about love.
I mean: I thought of myself as “not-looking for trouble” kind of person and mostly kind and friendly and funny and yea :p
But the truth just opened up my eyes and my heart and I really am rebuked by it.
It’s actually a constant struggle for me.
If love is a course, I would probably flunked the test :(

Trust Issue

Yep. Start with that one.
The bible said on John 4:16 “so we know and rely on the love God has for us.”
Knowing is one but trusting is another.
Most of the time, I worry so much that I acted like an unbeliever :(
Worry = not trusting = not loving.

Habitual

Love should be impartial and consistent.
I love people that love me. Friends and family, I even called them my loved-ones. I love babies, there’s so adorable, what’s not to love about them. But what about the rest of the people?
I usually just ignore them before I make things worst. After all isn’t ignorance a bliss?
But ignoring = not loving.

Choice and commitment

It’s not simply attraction, emotion and affection. It’s devotion.
But most of the time I’m like a switch: on and off, on and off, on and off…
And on and off = not loving.

But I’m learning now.
And hopefully I can pass the final exam!
*blushed* :`)

New Year!

Gosh! it's 2009... already!!!
I'm not ready :'( i really wish i have a pause button .
I don't know what i'm gonna do this year. I don't have a plan and don't know what to plan.
And i thought by now i must've move on. But i stayed.
Help me God...

Today God reminded me about Abraham and his journey.
Pretty much like me, he was clueless and he had his down-time too.
He worried. He doubted. He failed. But he also rised, repented and faithful.
And God was with him the whole time he failed until the end.
*blushed* :`)

And God had to sent my friend to convince me because He knows i'm a "Thomas"
I got an email today on "Tips how to thrive on 2009":
They key is to focus on—and believe—God's promises.
Focus on God's promises . . . and you will thrive in uncertainty. Take your eyes off of them, and you'll sink like Peter on the water when he took his eyes off Jesus.

Tip #1: Take daily note of God's promises.
You can't live by what you don't know. You can't eat if you don't know where food is. Therefore, you should spend a little time each day of 2009 in God's Word so that He can remind you of who He is and what He will do for you and through you.

Tip #2: Believe God's promises.
"Believe?" In the middle of chaos or pain or worry? I know, easier said than done. But it must be done! When you read God's promises to believers—of provision when you're in need, of peace when trouble is all around you, of power when you're weak—you must dare to believe that He will bring them to pass in your life. And then . . .

Tip #3: Stand on God's promises no matter what.
Here's some advice from someone who's been there. Once you commit to trust in God's promises to you . . . you'll be tested and challenged. And when you stand firm, you'll become stronger than ever—2009 will be a year of spiritual fitness for you.
It's okay to acknowledge that personal challenges seem foreboding. But dare to believe God anyhow! If you do, you'll see how great our God is.

God promises He "will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus" (Phil. 4:19).
WOW! what do you say to that? i'm spechless
*blushed* :`) again.