Awesome God

I'm so sorry it took me sooo looongggg to update :p
that should say something about my commitment issue :p :p :p

so WCC was, as always refreshing, rebuking and eye-opening.
I decided to join again this year again because i think i need it. i missed our church's retreat because i went to Utah with my friends :p *guilty* hahah

I absolutely LOVE our discussion after we back in our room :) we(me and my roommates+neighbors) still talk about God; Yes! He is that awesome :) And if you wanna hear the awesome workshops or session a lot of my friend bought the CD, so ask me, let me know :)

Awesome prayer ministry. I went up twice for the team to pray for me :) and i was trying so hard to stay sober, because i am an emotional person and i don't wanna make an emotional decision or judgment. I was trying so hard to stay sober :D And this is what i want to share what God reveals to me during this prayer time:

We were asked to have a quiet time with God and just asked Him to reveal what would hinder us from a possible ministry or relationship with God. i feel like all my life i've been a fearful person. I over-think, over-judge, over-cautious, over-prepared, over-... (you know what i mean) so we prayed and just bring that to God. I know that i have to trust God, but i haven't been surrendering; therefore not trust. :(

2nd prayer time was for us to ask God for a spiritual gift that would help us grow. so i was thinking like God what do i want? what do i need? finally: I want to be able to hear You, God; that what i said. You see, on WCC i feel so envious with the speaker and the counselors, etc etc they just have this awesome awesome relationship with God that they have literal conversations with God. They know what thing to say, they know what need to touch without the other person revealing even anything. I stop for a second and think to myself, would i have care so much too? if God had given me the ear to hear the needs of other people? maybe not :( maybe that's why God didn't trusted me with this gift, just yet :p after we prayed i went back to my seat, and God said the familiar phrase: seek Me and I will meet you there :) so yup that had say something about my so-so walk with God. I haven't been diligent :( I haven't been obedience to God :(

"My obedience = the will of God"

*blushed*