Santa Ramen - San Mateo

Ci Jenny and I been wanting to try this for a while, then finally we get a chance to tried this on sunday! What an experience - -" i was lost on my way to this place, I had to go passed the Loooooooooong san mateo bridge, i was so nervous because i'm not familiar with the are. Iphone GPS keeps changing made me missed my exit :'( My battery is low and my gas was already on E. Plus i had to pay $4 for passing the bridge that i don't need to :(

This is a one expensive ramen T.T because of all that!
There's a line still when i got there, i think me and ci jenny waited for about 20 minutes before we got our seat. It's not too bad, however i think the line was unnecessary because i saw empty tables - -" ok now on to the food: the food was great! However i will think twice to go here next time because of the distance, mostly because i was lost! hahahah :D I love the broth and the noodle, yummm! Halu is another alternative for closer ramen place since i live at san jose-west area, i love halu's ni tamago because the egg was cooked outside but it's half cooked inside. But i think Daikokuya's(Los Angeles) meat is better (melt in your mouth!) -> last time i ate there :)

I had the pork-flavored one


yummm... I wish they're in san jose and not san mateo T.T
Thank God that i can arrive safely at home after a good eat! :)

Los Gatos Cafe

My saturday was FUN!
It's still my birthday week :) and i feel sooo blessed for having people that love and care so much for me. Thank you God for placing them in my life :) I spend it with ci kiki and fam plus san2 :) they're doing a photo session for christmas-card and they invited me to join

After the photo-shoot, ci kiki and ko chris took us to eat at los gatos cafe :)
It's really good! If you don't wanna spend money and gas to go to Mama's at SF you should definitely try this :'p~
I really like ci kiki's apricot french - toast

Other dish to consider is ko chris's crabcakes

I think Mama's dungeness-crab egg-benedict is better but this one is pretty good too
then i had the seafood-benedict and san2 had the canadian omelette (Sorry no pics :() I think whatever you order over there will be equally good :p'~ however, the apricot french toast really got me! it's delish! :)
If you happen to try it someday, share with me your experience as well :)

*above pictures were taken from yelp, clearly the popular dishes :)

a Foodie

Wow... i have no idea that the dictionary have a name for people who like to eat like me :p -> they called us foodie
• FOODIE (noun)
The noun FOODIE has 1 sense:

a person devoted to refined sensuous enjoyment (especially good food and drink)

:D i really thank God for the opportunity to enjoy good food. it's truly a blessing. Some people cannot enjoy food because they don't have enough money and others can't enjoy good food because of health-reason.

So my fellow foodie (ci jenny) is going back for good this january :( so with the time left one of the things that she wants to do is to try restaurants she never been to. Good restaurant with good food of course... So me and her are on a quest with the help of yelpers and of course taking recommendation from our expert foodie: "Ela" -> go to good eats section for tips :)

And so we began our 1st quest last friday :)
so let me share a lil' bit of what we did:
Special thanks to nahing and ci jenny for giving me tickets to gabe bondoc "one night only" concert :) i truly enjoy the concert... gahhh :'p~ i wish God will bless me with a husband who has a voice like gabe :) ahhh him and his guitar = awesomeness! although i don't enjoy the full-band as much as i enjoy him singing acoustic-ly but it was greaaaattttt! thanks for the gift! i <3 it :) We had to leave early because of our dinner-reservation so i can't meet him in person :( hahah maybe next time :)

Dinner @ La Folie
overall exp: it's good but it's not great, i don't think it's a must try
I still think Gary Danko is better choice for the price, i had such a great experience over there (food & service) very satisfying!

i had frog legs for appetizer

I was expecting more, so it didn't really wow me, but it's good.
For the price we keep imagining frogs at indonesia :'p~ yummm hahhahah

then i had the duck

it was very tasty and generous portion :D i was happy with this dish

and for the desserts

I think it's the highlights. It was a perfect combination of sweet and salty :) I do think that this is a must try.

Starting today i thought i'd share my foodie quest :) i hope it'll be useful to you

Grateful

Main Entry: grate·ful
Pronunciation: \ˈgrāt-fəl\
Function: adjective
Etymology: obsolete grate pleasing, thankful, from Latin gratus — more at grace
Date: 1552

1 a : appreciative of benefits received b : expressing gratitude
2 a : affording pleasure or contentment : pleasing b : pleasing by reason of comfort supplied or discomfort alleviated


Today is my birthday *yayyy!!!*
So last night i got a lil' time just to have a rewind of what happened to me this year and past years...
A sister of Christ wrote this question one day on her post: Are you following God for His present or for His presence?
On one of my bible study each of use were to give summary/highlights of what happened this year and to give thanks for it. But come to think of it i don't have any really, i don't have a significant highlights. Some of us were married this year or engaged or got a new job but none of those stuffs are happening/applied to me :(

But this year i learned so much about God's faithfulness and His presence through it all. I learned so much about faith and hope in God. I learned so much about preserverance and being faithful. Learned patience in waiting, Learning to trust, to be humble, to be unselfish and that is always good to love more (I'm still learning, not yet an expert :p) Got my relationship restored, got the support i need from my loved ones :)

On my other bible study, we were asked to list out God's blessing (if we can't think of one, we should look at the life of those who are less fortunate than us). Whoa! that makes a difference isn't it? Most of the time i'll look up or look around me but i've never look down. It is a blessing for having a good family, being raised as a Christian, having the privilege to study in America, having the experience working in here and giving the chance in ministry at church and the list goes on...

God reminded me again this year: Nana, doesn't matter if you receive/not receive the gift that you want under the Christmas tree, you have already received the greatest gift of all: Jesus Christ and i'm forever grateful :)

*blushed*

God had made my birthday more special since 3 years ago :)
- december 16, 2007: ci kiki shared the news that she's pregnant in our bible study, full of tears-session T.T
- december 16, 2008: i got to celebrate it with my bible study group + baby maxie
- december 16, 2009: i got to celebrate it again with baby maxie this year!
God has shown Himself through the life of ci kiki and fam and over the years it inspires me in many ways. Thank you for being such a blessing and thank you for letting me be a part of it :)

I'm closing this with a song by hillsong - through it all
the story of my life is that God's with me through it all :)

Happy Thanksgiving

The most happiest person on earth must be the person who give thanks in all.

POSITIVE THINKING:
Researchers had found that grateful people report higher levels of positive emotions, more satisfaction with life, and more vitality and optimism. They also found grateful people show lower levels of depression and stress.

HOPEFUL:
What's more, they found that people who write weekly in a journal about things they are thankful for are healthier. They exercise more regularly, report fewer physical symptoms, and feel better in general than people who journal about neutral or negative life events.

CONTENT:
Finally, the research showed that people who daily count their blessings report higher levels of alertness, enthusiasm, determination, and energy.

These research was done without religious-ground. just facts.
The research wasn't discovering anything new, but rather confirming the will and wisdom of God. God already knows how great it is for us to be grateful. Now "science" does too.
God had shared this key of happiness in the bible: "Give thanks in all circumstances, for this is God's will for you in Christ Jesus." 1 Thessalonians 5:18

Sadly many of us including me haven't been practicing that :(
Even though the "good things" is not happening this season but as Christians, we can always find reason to give thanks – thanks for the salvation of Christ, the nearness of God, and the counsel of His Spirit :)

What can you give thanks for today?

Wake-up call

Ring
One of the question on a group-discussion for our bible study session last tuesday was: what are you really saying about God when you choose to dis-obey?
the harsh truth: i don't really believe that God is trustworthy and that He is on my side, and that He loves me, and that He's by my side :'( and by doing so: God is sad and hurt...

Ring-ring
Last sunday sermon were talking about love. The pastor quoted a paragraph from the book crazy love by Francis Chan. I don't remember the exact words but basically:
1. the simplest/most easy kind of love is the love for friends and family. Simple, everyone even criminals would easily love their friends and family.
2. the next level is the love for the needy, the poor, for those in trouble, etc. Pretty self explanatory :)
3. the highest level is: to love your enemy, to joyfully rejoice for those who's winning when you're failing. To Pray for those who talk about you (false accusation), etc. I'm sure you get my point here.

Confession:
The pastor last sunday said: "you can have the right doctrine but not the right heart." and what i'm about to say in the following pretty much reflect that. I'm so embarrass and sorry as well... for being such a disappointment :( so *taking a deep breath* here we go:
When i see people saying that they're blessed, or when they're thankful of something or that God is good!, in my heart i'll be saying: "Yea, sure. must be something good/great happening here." I was super-skeptical and just bitter :( but no. Once again God is trying to prove me wrong. Some of the situations that those people are in is worst than mine. Some of them loose everything. some of them didn't get what they want. Some of them are overwhelmed with work, some of them are struggling to live. Through those people God said to me during my quiet time: It is impossible to exaggerate Me, you know that. *humbly convicted*

Ring-ring-rriiinggg
- By grace, those people can say God is good because HE IS good! this one is pretty self explanatory. C'mon na, He died for them and you on the cross!!!
- The more self-centered you are, the more unsatisfied you will be.
- To be a woman of God is to be a woman who is faithful~unconditionally.
- and lastly it's from my morning prayer as i pray for myself, i want to pray for you as well who's maybe broken-hearted, disappointed, rejected, bitter or hurt:

Dear Jesus, I know You suffered the sting of rejection and hurt in a much more intense way than I ever will. And while this (enter your situation) is small in the grand scheme of life, it feels huge in my heart right now. Will You help me process this? Will You help me see past it? Will You let this fragile heart feel the warmth of Your love and grace today? In Jesus' Name, Amen.

living in state of grace *blushed*

Audited

So yea, my auditor is going to come today to audit our month-end stuffs...
i hope i do good. i hate it when when i think that i've prepared , but yet sometimes there's another hole that i'm un-aware of :[

So the same thing goes with my life :[
i thank God for using my bible studies to help audit me :]
and the result is: i didn't do so well... i have holes all over :/
i'm quite dissapointed with my true answer... because i KNOW what i believe, what i suppose to believe, but i'm not living it, which is also mean i don't really believe :[

choices to be or not to be a woman of God. what do you believe about God, is He good or is He not? choose child. That question is kinda like the theme on the book and for some reason keep ringing and bugging me after our BS session on tuesday. and i know probably that is because i'm dissapointed at myself. i know what i'm suppose to do, but i'm not doing it. i'm really sorry Lord... thank you for being so patient with me.

Life's been hard :[ and i have always been amazed at people who's worshiping God with full-passion still; despite of, inspite of. Always wanna be one. So maybe now God's giving me a chance... for me to choose, say and act.

"I believe that God is good."

I have known the Father's care for me
He's been good.. He's been good
Through it all He's always there for me
God's been (so) good to me

Through the storm.. Through the night
Come what may everything will be alright
I have known the Father's care for me
God's been good to me


*blushed*

TGIF :)

introducing my friend nahing
:) (taken from our g-chat session)

Natalia: guess what i had for dinner last night
me: rabbit? gaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhh T.T
Natalia: HAHAHAHA
oh yeah, forgot to pick that up from your house..
me: - -"
Natalia: maybe one day...
haha i had chicken nuggets i haven't had that since davis!
anyway, i burned them gosong
me: you burned them AGAIN?
*smack hand to YOUR head*
- -" *geleng2*
Natalia: hahahaha
i duno how!! they always burn
me: pake oven lbi enak
Natalia: no matter the temperature
me: jgn pake microwave
Natalia: or for how long
iya ini pake oven
me: they should tell u on THE BOXXXX
Natalia: hahahaa
i dont like to read
me: omg - -"
Natalia: masakin dong...
hahaha
Sent at 11:05 AM on Friday
me: moyung - -"
ci jenny's head will surely be copot this time she hear this story
Natalia: hahaha
we like to make her geleng her kepala and make her cry :)
hahaha we're so loving

*blushed* from malu-ness - -"

:)

Blessed!

I just wanna share one of the proof that I really am blessed :)
I'm surrounded by friends of God that always encourage me
Check my I FOLLOW list on the bottom right --->
This one is taken from Fonda's blog, she is a gifted writer with a wonderful heart!

Be still

Another quote that’s too good to be kept for myself:
"We need to wait on God, NOT because we need answers, but because He is WORTHY of being waited upon" - Alicia Britt Chole
Take heart, seek diligently, be patient and be still.

*blushed*

B E A U - tiful!

More than words :)
*blushed*

Don't worry, be happy

*Gasp!* is the end of september
that means i HAVE TO wake up - -"
as usual i'm never ready - -"

anyway,
We're just starting to use the One month to live book on one of my bible study
On the 1st chapter we're doing self assesment-sort of :o)
1st part for people to review on you and the 2nd one is for you to review yourself.

I'm kinda dissapointed on myself on the people review. It seems like i haven't really been doing things that really matter T.T and i didn't get my priority right.

At the end of the assesment, they asked us to put 5 things we wanna do if we only have 1 month to live and we have to start doing 1 of those things this week :) so one of my commitment is "I choose to be happier" :']

It's been a while since i feel happy :(
Things are not going my way :( and maybe they never will :(
It's really hard to accept things you don't like and to let go things you do like :(
(notice on the number of :( T.T and - -" -> you'll know that i'm not happy)
So the application is: for me to journal on the things that i should be thankful for instead of looking at the negatives and start complaining like i always do :(

so here it it is:

Sept 17'09 - I thank God for my bible study: for the reminder, encouragement and accountability :)
Sept 18'09 - I thank God because He never give up on me, I thank God for a treasured-friendship :) <3 yossi and ci en2
Sept 19'09 - I thank God for Houston trip and being able to enjoy good food. I thank God for puting a smile on my face :) throughout the trip!
Sept 20'09 - I thank God for CALIFORNIA's weather, it's trully the best :p
Sept 21'09 - I thank God for the power and strength You've given so I can survive the monday at work :p
Sept 22'09 - I thank God for showering me enough love and grace to deal with unpleasant situation/ difficult people :p
Sept 23'09 - I thank God for God's protection and presence unto Pho2's life. She is 83 years old today :)
Sept 24'09 - I thank God for giving me enough energy to move and to stay WAY pass my bed time :p
Sept 25'09 - I thank God that I can spent time with ci en2 today despite all the moving-hectic :)
Sept 26'09 - I thank God :) for ci jenny :) + nahing + ci en2. I thank God for the wonderful and the super majestic view, You are trully an awesome awesome God! (i'll post the pictures of our trip one of these days :)) *tears of joy*
Sept 27'09 - I thank God for Your presence in my life :) i'm really sad with the goodbye, really tired with the moving and nearly breakdown after miso's cage :( but I thank God for holding me up in all situations :)
Sept 28'09 - I thank God for You always watch over me :) through little things, You show that you care. 1 Peter 5:7 :) Thank God for the shopping cart :p
Sept 29'09 - I thank God for my lil' chat with Fonda, we both agree that we need to do more praying :) and also thank God for the time we can spend time with Irene before she went back to indo
Sept 30'09 - Thank God that today is pay-day :p :) Thank you for providing my needs.

Notice the number of :)?
*blushed*

Wake me up when september ends...

Hehehehehe :)
The weather is starting to drop. It was raining sunday night and it's been cool/cold since. I'm gonna blame it to the weather for making me lazy - -" to do anything, if i could i would stay in bed all day! :) I think the weather has made everyone feeling under the weather, yeah everyone excepts me...

My roomate is not feeling well yesterday she had a fever, she's getting better later on the day but i'm scared that this morning she might feel sick again. Morning is like the worst for sick-people! >.<

My baby maxie is sick :( baby, aunty miss hugging you and kissing you and playing with you :) I hope you get well real soon :) Praying for your speedy recovery :) I miss your eye-smile! :)

So, I have always wanted to be sick, to just spend my sick day! I know, i know you probably think i'm crazy - -" hehehehehe but the matter of a fact is: I rarely sick. I guess I have to thank God for that. I never been sick enough to appreciate health :( I'm sorry Lord for taking things for granted.

Reminder:
1 Corinthians 6:19-20

19Do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit, who is in you, whom you have received from God? You are not your own; 20you were bought at a price. Therefore honor God with your body.

*blushed*

911

So my parents were flying back today, we sent them to SFO last night...
I miss'em so much already T.T

I had shared with yossi, that I'm not a superstitious person or anything like that but somehow knowing that they're flying on Sept 11, worries me... :( She said to me: "Jangan mau diboongin iblis!" She's kind enough to check up on me at 12am my time, meaning it's 2am her place *hugsss* :)

I thank God for words of comfort that i received today through devotional, through friends and even through the writing on a wall :) and if you are foolish-ly worry like me, I want to share these encouraging words:

"Lord, please remind me; that there's nothing that are going to happen today that You and I together cannot handle." -> the writing on the wall

Psalm 91
1 He who dwells in the shelter of the Most High
will rest in the shadow of the Almighty. --> klove on the way to work

"This is the day the LORD has made; we will rejoice and be glad in it" (Psalm 118:24). --> today's devotion

Today is the day - Lincoln Brewster

I`m casting my cares aside
I`m leaving my past behind
I`m setting my heart and mind on You, Jesus

I`m reaching my hand to Yours
Believing there`s so much more
Knowing that all You have in store for me is good, is good

Chorus:
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won`t worry about tomorrow
I`m trusting in what You say
Today is the day

I putting my fears aside
I`m leaving my doubts behind
I`m giving my hopes and dreams to You, Jesus

I`m reaching my hands to Yours
Believing there`s so much more
Knowing that all You have in store for me is good, Is good

Chorus:
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won`t worry about tomorrow
I`m trusting in what You say
Today is the day

I will stand upon Your truth.
(I will stand upon Your truth)
And all my days I`ll live for You
(And all my days I`ll live...)

Chorus:
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
Today is the day You have made
I will rejoice and be glad in it
And I won`t worry about tomorrow
I`m giving you my fears and sorrows
Where you lead me I will follow
I'm trusting in what you say
Today is the day!

He had to convinced me 3-times because i'm so weak
I'm sorry Tuhan Yesus :(
*blushed* <3

FEARLESS

Count to Eight (Woe, Be Gone)
by Max Lucado

"We have here only five loaves and two fish." (Matt. 14:17)

How do you suppose Jesus felt about the basket inventory? Any chance he might have wanted them to include the rest of the possibilities? Involve all the options? Do you think he was hoping someone might count to eight?

"Well, let's see. We have five loaves, two fish...and Jesus!" Jesus Christ. The same Jesus who told us:

Ask and it will be given to you; seek and you will find; knock and the door will be opened to you. (Luke 11:19 NIV)

If you remain in me and my words remain in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be given you. (John 15:7 NIV)

What ever you ask for in prayer, believe that you have received it, and it will be yours. (Mark 11:24 NIV)

Standing next to the disciples was the solution to their problems...but they didn't go to him. They stopped their count at seven and worried.

What about you? Are you counting to seven, or to eight?

Here are eight worry stoppers to expand your tally:

Pray, first. "Casting the whole of your care [all your anxieties, all your worries, all your concerns, once and for all] on Him...(I Peter 5:7 AMP)

Easy now. Slow down. "Rest in the Lord, and wait patiently for Him (Ps. 37:7).

Act on it. The moment a concern surfaces, deal with it. Don't dwell on it. Head off worries before they get the best of you. Be a doer, not a stewer.

Compile a worry list. Over a period of days record your anxious thoughts. Then review them. How many of them turned into a reality?

Evaluate your worry categories. Detect recurring areas of preoccupation that may become obsessions. Pray specifically about them.

Focus on today. God meets daily needs daily. He will give you what you need when it is needed.

Unleash a worry army. Share your feelings with a few loved ones. Ask them to pray with and for you.

Let God be enough. "Your heavenly Father already knows all your needs. Seek the Kingdom of God above all else, and live righteously, and he will give you everything you need." (Matt. 6:32-33 NLT).

Eight steps. Pray, first. Easy, now. Act on it. Compile a worry list.Evaluate your worry categories. Focus on today. Unleash a worry army. Let God be enough.
P-E-A-C-E-F-U-L

*blushed*

News Update

Whoa! it's the end of august already - -"
so fast... as usual, i'm not ready :(
for things that has happened or yet to happen, i'm never ready... why na...? :(

update (warning: it's a long one :p):
1. my parent're here :)
Thank God for His protection for my family :)
we sorta had our lil' talk and i'm still sensing their disagreement esp. my mom's and it just made me really sad and frustrated. Still no news from the lawyer :( has made it harder for me to plan my next step. Help me God... what dissapoints me is that She always has the talk about God' will and "Berkat Tuhanlah yang menjadikan kaya, susah payah tidak menambahinya." Amsal 10 : 22 If so then what's the matter with going back in indo. I know, I know that it breaks her heart because i didn't leave up to her expection and i feel bad for being rebellious :( because most of my friends, they did what their parents want them to do. I just want to be understood, is it too much to aks? Plus my dad said that He doesn't know how much time he have left, I know, i know life is in God's hand but as much as i can i wanna spend my time with him. I just, I can't do this myself :'( Help me God... as much as i'm angry i love them, i really do. Otherwise i won't be this frustrated...
2. my dear cousin was married last saturday, glad to hear that he's happy.
with all of the things that happened between us, i feel that he's like a brother i have never had. because we argue, a lot! :D we had our fights, but we care deep down about each other. I'm gonna miss him... :(
3. one of my uncle in indo got diagnose with cancer, it makes me really sad :(
He's a believer and his kids all grown-up with family of their own, but still i can't imagine how sad/hard the news is for them... even for me :'( the doctor had suggested to do an operation, but he doesn't wanna do it, because the sensei(chinese doctor) he's been seeing said that the cancer going to spread with the operation.
[Please pray together with me :) for him]
4. so we're watching Laskar Pelangi last night, it's kinda like Indo's version of slumdog millionaire :p my mom and dad is from Belitung Island in indo and apparently the movie was about Belitung-kid, they filmed everything there :) a little promotion, i always thought that Belitung is better than Bali :) it's undiscovered before :) therefore undeveloped :( unlike bali. My parents said that because of the movie a lot of tourists actually go to belitung now. here's sneak preview of how beautiful belitung is, you can browse different pictures. It's a really good movie :) it's about the importance/hardship of education. This poor kid (who's the main character) is a successful man today, and this story is about him and his classmates and his dedicated teacher. This movie was a success in Indo and they dedicated some of the profit to further education in the poor-school.
5. my bff and his fiancee were here over the weekend. Man! i miss having her around :) her bubbly-ness just bubbling everyone :) i miss her already, but thank God in 2 weeks, I'll have another visits :) she's an amazing baker/person! kekekekeke, she was here for the wedding and during the ceremony i shed a single tear so she said to me: "don't cry more than me on my wedding!" hahahah, i think i will dude! :p

Phew... sorry if it's too long :)
I just want to end today's update with the song that we sang yesterday at church, it really gives me strength:
I know who holds tomorrow

Great is Thy faithfullness

so last sunday we're talking about how waiting and wondering can be.
it is exactly how i feel right now.
Clueless - -"
Things aren't going like how i wanted to be - -"

However this verse stuck in my head and i wanted to share it with you guys:

Genesis 15
God's Covenant With Abram
1 After this, the word of the LORD came to Abram in a vision:
"Do not be afraid, Abram.
I am your shield, [a]
your very great reward. [b] "

I feel like God is trying to tell me the same thing:
After this, the word of the LORD came to Nana through sunday sermon:
"Do not be afraid, na.
I am your shield,
your very great reward. "


2 Timothy 2:13 (New International Version)

13if we are faithless,
he will remain faithful,
for he cannot disown himself.

*blushed*
Thank God for an awesome God!

the GOAL

Today when i open biblegateway the TODAY VERSE is:
“I press on toward the goal to win the prize for which God has called me heavenward in Christ Jesus.”- Philippians 3:14

Gosh! It made me realize: that I've lost track. I got distracted by my situation and drowned in the confusion. I said to the God that the only thing out of my life is to make Him proud of me. That one day He can say to me: "Well done, good and faithful servant!"

Instead of looking at my goal I've been looking at my surrounding.
God, if I may, I need one more confirmation...

Please pray for me
Please pray with me :)

may God be seen

Week of July 17
My Struggles are About Him
by Max Lucado

What about your struggles? Is there any chance, any possibility, that you have been selected to struggle for God's glory? Have you "been granted for Christ's sake, not only to believe in Him, but also to suffer for His sake" (Philippians 1:29)?

Here is a clue. Do your prayers seem to be unanswered? What you request and what you receive aren't matching up? Don't think God is not listening. Indeed he is. He may have higher plans.

Here is another. Are people strengthened by your struggles? A friend of mine can answer yes. His cancer was consuming more than his body; it was eating away at his faith. Unanswered petitions perplexed him. Well-meaning Christians confused him. "If you have faith," they said, "you will be healed."

No healing came. Just more chemo, nausea, and questions. He assumed the fault was a small faith. I suggested another answer. "It's not about you," I told him. "Your hospital room is a showcase for your Maker. Your faith in the face of suffering cranks up the volume of God's song."

Oh, that you could have seen the relief on his face. To know that he hadn't failed God and God hadn't failed him--this made all the difference. Seeing his sickness in the scope of God's sovereign plan gave his condition a sense of dignity. He accepted his cancer as an assignment from heaven: a missionary to the cancer ward.

A week later I saw him again. "I reflected God," he said, smiling through a thin face, "to the nurse, the doctors, my friends. Who knows who needed to see God, but I did my best to make him seen."

Bingo. His cancer paraded the power of Jesus down the Main Street of his world.

God will use whatever he wants to display his glory. Heavens and stars. History and nations. People and problems.

Rather than begrudge your problem, explore it. Ponder it. And most of all, use it. Use it to the glory of God.

Through your problems and mine, may God be seen.

AMEN! *blushed*

My update:
I decided to talk with the HR anyways after contemplating for quite some times, so we'll see what happens...
So sad to hear and see all the news today is about bombing that happened yesterday at Jakarta. Thank God really for my dad's visa. It's like right on time, He got before all this happened. Must be harder to get it now.
When talking with my parents yesterday, I sense they still want me to be here. I was again of course upset especially with my mom, because why wouldn't they just support my decision and said: Yes, i know it's gonna be hard but we're going to go through it together. And besides, to my defense: God's protection is not limited to people staying in the United States!!! *arrrghhh* I'm so emotional. And other thing: do you think i'll be fine and happy having the "security" here but knowing that my mom and dad are not.

:( *confused*

He calls my name :)

I'm sooo happy that i got to record baby maxie saying nanananana :D
I listen to it over and over and over again and it makes me happy!

So during one of my quiet time, i came to realize God must've been feel same way. How he longed for all of us to call His name :)
Just my two cents, for those of you who feel or are drifted away from God, He's waiting for You to call His name :)
and God's name is certainly not like my name, I can't do anything. But His name is powerful!

My dad is going to apply us visa today in indo, im quite nervous.
I know He is too :)
so i prayed to God for calmless and peacefulness for all of us, knowing & trusting it in God's hands, whatever happens God knows best -> it's really hard to say that :( But He indeed knows best. I can't argue nor deny it.

YOUR NAME - Paul Baloche

Jesus, in Your Name we pray
Come and fill our hearts today
Lord, give us strength to live for You and glorify Your Name

CHORUS
Your Name is a strong and mighty tower
Your Name is a shelter like no other
Your Name, let the nations sing it louder
'Cause nothing has the power to save but Your Name

AMEN! *blushed*

the Not so Secret ;)

Starbucks:
Cap'n Crunch (Not on the menu) but it is requestable :)
It tastes exactly like the cereal
It is actually Strawberry's cream frappuccino with toffee nut & java chip

Jamba juice:
White gummy (as in gummy bear); also red gummy
Pink Starburst
Amazingly tastes exactly like it :p

Gchat non-listed emoticons:
>.< = WINCE
+/'\ = COWBELL
}:-) = DEVIL
V.v.V = CRAB
:() = MONKEY
:(:) = PIG
< / 3 = BROKEN HEART
:-x or :* = KISS
: { = MOUSTACHE
:'( = CRYING
[:] = ROBOT
~@~ = POO

ENJOY :)

God is cheering for you!!!

By Max Lucado

If your God is Mighty enough to ignite the sun, could it be that He is mighty enough to light your path?
God is for you. Not "may be," not "has been," not "was," not "would be," but "God is!" He is for you. Today. At this hour. At this minute. As you read this sentence. No need to wait in line or come back tomorrow. He is with you. He could not be closer than he is at this second. His loyalty won't increase if you are better nor lessen if you are worse. He is for you.
God is for you. Turn to the sidelines; that's God cheering your run.
Look past the finish line; that's God applauding your steps. Listen for him in the bleachers, shouting your name. Too tired to continue? He'll carry you. Too discouraged to fight? He's picking you up. God is for you.
God is for you. Had he a calendar, your birthday would be circled. If he drove a car, your name would be on his bumper. If there's a tree in heaven, he's carved your name in the bark. We know he has a tattoo, and we know what it says. "I have written your name on my hand," he declares (Isa. 49:16).

Update

People are leaving, what's new *sighhh*
Yup, my roomate is leaving in 3 weeks :(
My other friend is leaving for good on july
My bff is leaving on december
and so i think maybe this time it's my time too...
I don't know...

I cry myself to sleep last night, asking-pleading God to just let me know what He wants me to do next. The time is so near it scares me... I'm not doing my part to extend my h1b while the time i supposed to do it is NOW! I wanted to wait. I want to wait. For I know that He is always on-time. And so i thought the time is NOW. NOW is the deadline. But all i hear was silence.

I remembered hearing klove sometimes last week about how you know when God's talking to you, how you hear God's voice. I heard bunch of different stories, one that i remembered was this guy sitting on his truck about to use drugs but then God intervered. He said it was like a voice in his heart and life been different ever since. I went to ALCF for their Night of Worship last week and one of the testimony was also about God intervering with lifes and lifes change.

But what about me? How come i haven't heard anything yet God?
Sometimes i wonder if i already know the answer and i'm just afraid to go with it.

The easier life would be staying here, apart from it's hard being away from my parents of course. But here, it seems like my life is set. Yea sure, i'm doing the same routine boring things, but that what makes it so easy.

For good - i have no idea what i'm gonna do
the only happy thoughts is that i'll be with my parents
for all that i know, it won't be the same as having a vacation back
for me it'll be all downgrade
my independence-y of doing things, it'll be gone :(

so i think about it over and over and over, am i stupid or what? to choose the more uncertain path? the downgrade one?! i don't know...

He didn't tell me what He wanted me to do, but He did tell me: "I'll be with you" so that is how i come up with the decision to go back this year. I think...

The sermon last sunday:
Our God is a creative God and He loves us so much that He's willing to change His mind on us that is when we decide or when we want to do other things. He's willing to work with us. And that no matter how wrong the road that we take/took; He can change it. Bad to good. Death to life. Left to Right. Jesus loves me, i just need to trust that. I always think the bad that could happen and because i hated that thing or i'm weak at that; i think God will purposely, intendedly gives me that. Even if He did though, it's not to watch me suffer but because He loves me.

I did ask Him to give me peace so i can live joyfully. and i think He did answered that one through sunday's sermon.
God: "It doesn't matter, na."
Afterall, He did answer...

*blushed*

Thank You :)

We finally finished our 40 days of love :) yayyy!!!

if anything, i learned to be really grateful for friends and family that put up with me, despite all, inspite all... :) i've learned that it's so easy to show love to your loved ones, but not to people that you (not hate) but prefer to avoid *sighhh*

I learned that at times, i could be irritating and annoying and mostly selfish! :(
thank God who never give up on me and unconditionally accepts me.
thank God for friends who tell me what i need to hear not what i want to hear.
and mostly i'm sorry for my dearest loved ones, because on those ugly-times, i've hurt you the most :( i have taken you for granted, the ones who i know, will always be there for me :(

ok enough for the mushy part :'( *tears*
hehehehhe :)
with my other bible study, we're studying a new chapter on spiritual breakthrough... i'm excited! but always the challenge is when you have to do it *sighhh* sometimes i purposely don't wanna be knowledgeable on somethings, because i know, when i know then i'm gonna have to start doing something about it...

but i'm excited to see God's works on us :)
on me: my trust-issue :p

But whatever You do, Lord…don’t leave me the same. - Joanna Weaver (Having a Mary Spirit)

What's your story?

It's a pretty interesting weekend i have :)

I thank God for the opportunity that I can be once again go to disneyworld...
it's a trully magical place :) ahhh... we spent our saturday night watching fireworks at magic kingdom, it's 10 minutes of uuuuuhsss... and aahhhhssss :)

I got to learned about love-lesson over this trip. And it's really hard to love difficult people. But God do it to me every hour, every minute, every second of my life. Thank you God for showering me with Your unconditional love.

and oh, my bff got officially engaged! YAY!!! :D

I looked at the life of others and they seemed to have things plan out already. They are not in the place they were before. They moved on. But when i look at mine, i'm still here... and i don't have a plan, i don't know what i'm suppose to do next...
but this morning God reminded me through today's devotion:
"Stop comparing your story to any one else's story. You are unique. Give God the pen and let Him write the next chapter."

Dear Jesus, I am a witness. A story unfolded and written by Your hand. Give me courage to tell it to someone who needs to hear it. Thank You for being the Author of every chapter of my life. In Jesus' Name, amen.

In the meanwhile, He gave me (us) something to hold on to:
Ephesians 3:20
He is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask or imagine, according to his power that is at work within us

keep P.U.S.H-ing : Pray Until Something Happens :)

Excited >.<

It's 3 days before orlando :)

To be honest i'm pretty stress... but then i decided to just let it out and be honest... so i shared my concern with my friends and i think i feel better now :) thank you God...

I'm going to be MC this friday, I knew i wanted to share about miss california, so i did a little research on the articles after miss USA.

So here's what i found:

"I learned that God has a bigger crown than any man can give you," she said.

"I don't take back what I said," she told Lauer, adding that she "had spoken from my heart, from my beliefs and for my God."

"It's not about being politically correct," she said. "For me, it's about being biblically correct."

*blushed*

Another Freebbiesss

april 27 -> KFC grilled chicken
april 28 -> El Pollo Loco

WAH! i'm definitely going to try those :p

I'm super excited for my vacation next week to orlando... :)
but at the same time kinda nervous... :/
but God will be with us, so it's all good!

Have a blessed week everyone...

"Say hey, it’s a good day
Even if things aren’t going my way
Jesus is Lord and I am saved
So, say hey, it’s a good day"

FREEBIES :)

I Love freebies and deals and coupons hahahh :D
On my agenda:
april 21 -> ben n jerry free scoop
april 22 -> 8 pieces of chicken at popeyes for 4.99
april 29 -> baskin n robbins .31

I went to get my cherry garcia last night... and the line wasn't that bad compared to last year :)
YAY!!! free ice cream on a hot day!

Flip side:
I got my laptop for FREE as a birthday gift from my beloved friends about 2 years ago
I was happy and content about it because it's free :)
I got it for free but my friends actually paid for it
For every FREE stuff that we get, it's an EXPENSE for others

I got reminded on this quote saying that our salvation is FREE but it ain't cheap!
Jesus paid for our sin with His life so that we can be free

*blushed*
free stuff = hidden love

INVU

I got the opportunity accompanying my friend this weekend to look at wedding dresses.
Man! she looked super pretty :D
I really wanna try it on too but then i feel wierd...
I hope i can wear one someday :)

If you're waiting like me, i just wanna share some quotes from my bible study leader's blog. This is what she said when she waited for God's best!
"I am worth waiting for. Through Jesus’ strength, I can stand firm, unwavering, as I wait for God’s best."

Highlight of the week:
last night was the miss usa pageant.
Miss CA was asked this controversial question regarding gay marriage.
I almost positive she's going to state her support for gay marriage...
but she'd surprised me with her answer. She said according to what she believes that the marriage should be between man and woman. :) *props to you miss CA* you just made me blush :)

Even though her answer might jeopardize her winning but God was smiling last night when she answered that. She came in number 2. I thought she would've gotten number 5 because of her answer :9 so yayyyyy!!! to miss CA :)

Lesson:
I often trying to seek approval of men that i give in to the pattern of this world :(

Galatians 1:10 (New International Version)
10Am I now trying to win the approval of men, or of God? Or am I trying to please men? If I were still trying to please men, I would not be a servant of Christ.

Blessed Assurance

Jeremiah 29:11 (New International Version)
11 For I know the plans I have for you," declares the LORD, "plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future.

Savior, Please

-John Wilson

Savior, please take my hand
I work so hard, I live so fast
This life begins, and then it ends
And I do the best that I can, but I don't know how long I'll last

I try to be so tough
But I'm just not strong enough I can't do this alone,
God I need You to hold on to me
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love
Savior, please keep saving me

Savior, please help me stand
I fall so hard, I fade so fast
Will You begin right where I end
And be the God of all I am because You're all that I have

I try to be so tough
But I'm just not strong enough
I can't do this alone, God I need You to hold on to me
I try to be good enough
But I'm nothing without Your love
Savior, please keep saving me

Hallelujah
Everything You are to me
Is everything I'll ever need
And I am learning to believe
That I don't have to prove a thing
'Cause You're the one who's saving me

*blushed*

Let go and Let God!

Today is supposedly miso’s b’day :)
Yayyy! Happy b’day miso :)
A lil introduction: miso is my bunny, I have him for about 4 years now :)

Today, I got reminded on this verse through my morning devotion:
"'For my thoughts are not your thoughts, neither are your ways my ways,'" declares the Lord. 'As the heavens are higher than the earth, so are my ways higher than your ways and my thoughts than your thoughts.'" Isaiah 55:8-9 (NIV)

About three years ago, miso fell and he fractured his bone. I took him to the doctor, and the doctor pretty much said that it was the end of him. The doctor gave me pain killers and a week to decide what to do with him. I definitely don’t want to put him to sleep but at the same time my heart just can’t bear seeing him hurting. And me, of course with my “fear of loosing” and my attachment to him, I cried like crazy, my friends were trying to console me. But thank God, God gave me extraordinary bunny and extraordinary friends. He survived through that, I don’t know how. I don’t know why.

I always wanted to be a story, and I thank God for giving me this story to remember. I realize that many times I have asked God for miracles to happen in my life but not once I want to be in that miserable hopeless state again.

However, I think I am now in that state
I am in that place again
confuse+worry+scared :(
I am super scared but excited for Your miracle...
Help me to hold on to Your promise...

me + GOD = *blushed*

I dreamed a dream

I came across this lady: Susan Boyle from Brittain's got talent!
She's amazing and her voice just brought tears in my eyes.
She deserves the three yes-es from the judges.

It's a lesson for everyone: don't judge the book by its cover.
Everyone was laughing at her at first, but at the end of the performance noone who wasn't in awe. she got a standing ovation.

You should check her out on youtube :)

1 Samuel 16:7 (New International Version)
7 But the LORD said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height, for I have rejected him. The LORD does not look at the things man looks at. Man looks at the outward appearance, but the LORD looks at the heart."

*blushed*

I'm singin'

-kari Jobe

Only one name lasts forever
Only one fame stands alone
Only one King has an anthem
That goes on and on and on

And I'm Singing to the God who brings redemption to the nations
Kings and oceans bow to Him in praise
And I'm Singing to the God who wrote the book on our salvation
To the One who covers me in grace
I'm Singing

Only one word in the beginning
Only one truth will prevail
Only one love brings you freedom
Only one Man took the nails

And I'm Singing to the God who brings redemption to the nations
Kings and oceans bow to Him in praise
And I'm Singing to the God who wrote the book on our salvation
To the One who covers me in grace
I'm Singing

Praise, Praise to the Savior
Praise, to the Lamb Of God
Praise, in all of His splendor
Praise, for saving my life

I'm singin' ... :)

The happiest place on earth :)

I absolutely love disney :)
I think i did mention it that to me is indeed the happiest place on earth :)
props to walt disney :)
He died from lung cancer in 1966, but his name remains and greatly remembered :)

I've been struggling about my future quite a while
Actually try very hard to avoid it, but it's inevitable, just gotta face it now!
I've learned in these couple of weeks that: the happiest place on earth is in the center of God's will :) there's peace, joy, and definitely a dream come true!
I haven't reach there yet...
but hopefully, I'm on my way... (help me God)

I still don't know what I'm gonna do, or where I'm gonna be at but as long I'm with Him, I know I'm gonna be fine. Thank You God for blessed assurance!

And just like Walt Disney, I wish of a life that can be greatly remembered.
I wanna leave a legacy of You, Lord :)

*blushed*

When i think about the Lord ... *blushed*

by: hillsong united
and by me :o)

When I Think about the Lord,
How He saved me
How He raised me
How He filled me with the Holy Ghost
How He healed me to the uttermost

When I Think about the Lord,
How He picked me up and turned me around
How He placed my feet on solid ground

*It makes me wanna shout: Hallellujah!
Thank you JESUS
LORD, your worthy of all the glory and all the honor and all the praise...*

*blushed* :)

Hello Love :)

Me and my friends, we had the opportunity to watched Chris Tomlin's concert yesterday night. It was awesome :) Lotsa testimony and encouraging word.
God reminded me again and again through people and their experience... that I am blessed to have known God in my life.

I thank You God for being so patient with me
Everything seems so fuzzy for me Lord
I pray for clear signs that You will show me what to do and which road to take
Help me to have the right attitude despite of my situation
Help me to know You are near :)

2 Corinthians 12:8-10 (New International Version)
"8Three times I pleaded with the Lord to take it away from me. 9But he said to me, "My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness." Therefore I will boast all the more gladly about my weaknesses, so that Christ's power may rest on me. 10That is why, for Christ's sake, I delight in weaknesses, in insults, in hardships, in persecutions, in difficulties. For when I am weak, then I am strong."

I am going to lead worship tonight, and i'm quite nervous because i don't think i'm ready. I'm not encouraging enough for myself and i don't know if i can be encouraging for others... help me God and to God be all glory for today's ministry.

Grant me joy and peace :)

WICKED - the musical

finally watched it :) i <3 it!
it was awesome... man! wish i could sing like that :)
it's funny, it'e really entertaining, guarantee you won't get bored :)
highly reccommended! :D

i was watching it again and again days after that... it was on youtube :)
heheheh...

He pinky-promised :)

I was driving from work 2 days ago, when i saw pretty rainbow.
I know that God was speaking to me, i suddenly feel LOVED!
I can hear His promises in my ears, that He's holding me.

G: "Everything's gonna be allright, na..."
n: Thank you God... :)

" i don't have a god i can hold in my hands
i have a God whose holding me."

*blushed*

Mean Girl

That’s how I see myself these couple of days.
I hate it :(
I don’t know what to do, what to say or how to act.

BRAVE FACE(polinar) © 2008

i put on a brave faceevery time i see you and you're with her
everybody tells me that you and me will never work
i have come to terms with this somehow
i'm ok but there's still a part of me that wants to hear you saying that you love me
saying that you love me now
i look for cues i search for signs
anything that would make me feelmore than fine
but then i get tired of trying to be inspired
i'll just to have accept that you're moving on, moving on, moving on...

:( Help me God, I need You…
Give me enough love and grace to be sincere, enough strength and power to move on
bring me back to You...
Psalm 34:18
The Lord is close to the brokenhearted and saves those who are crushed in spirit
*flushed*

You've got tag!

Rules: Once you've been tagged, you are supposed to write a note with 25 random things, facts, habits, or goals about you. At the end, choose 25 people to be tagged. You have to tag the person who tagged you. If I tagged you, it's because I want to know more about you.

I’ve been tagged on Facebook, I thought I share a lil bit of myself:
1. I miss my parents everyday T.T and absolutely hate the fact that I’m 8708 miles away from them T.T
2. Even though I think I’m quite careful, I get cuts and bruises daily. I hate sharp edges, I think they all should just be round and friendly :], just like my drawings :]
3. I like the number 7 and 8, but nothing superstitious: I have my own reasons. Btw, nana is 7 in Japanese :]
4. I feel like I’m under-develop - -“ if I have 3 wishes it’ll be to have a longer chin, longer fingers and to be taller!
5. I always wanted to have a big brother, but now I just wish I have siblings :[, any will do. But i think God provide my need through friends :] best friends!
6. I can’t make decision, most of the time indecisive. Not that I don’t care but I just don’t mind.
7. I haven’t found any allergies or any food that I don’t like yet :9 I enjoy eating good food with a good view. I love checking yelp out for a good review on restaurants. Highly recommending: Gary Danko!
8. I like colors that are “ga jelas” and adore details on things, for example: lil button, or ruffles on the edges will make me go awwwww…
9. I hate reptiles and bugs and scary movies. They creep me out…
10. I used to be afraid of dogs, but now I wish I could have a bichon or old-english sheepdog, maybe someday I will.
11. I love to sing! and have a thing for musicians, i think they're cool :9
12. I don't believe in love at first sight.
13. I am a cheapo and proud to be one! :D I love freebies and deals and coupons and vouchers and discounts. Disclaimer: I’m NOT stingy.
14. It’s really hard to identify my favorites, because apparently I have lots of favorites (I have lots of paling suka!)
15. I like early spring, because that’s the time when my favorite tree is blooming, I can seriously say my favorite in this case :p
16. I’m a sucker for dimples. I don’t have dimples myself, but my car does :p
17. I love the smell of laundry <3>
18. I think babies are supposed to be chubby. But regardless I think babies are just adorably cute!
19. I cried when miso (my bunny) pooped for the 1st time. But now: I’m attached! I love you miso hot.
20. I love the sky, the one thing that I never get bored of. I like how blue the sky is and how fluffy the cloud is. I feel loved whenever i see the ray of sun breaking through the clouds. My jaw would drop everytime rainbow appear on the sky. I’m amazed on how stars and moon enjoying each other’s company. How great is our GOD!
21. I can’t multitask while driving - -“ I miss exits, etc etc…
22. I hate goodbyes. Enuf said.
23. I am a hopeless romantic, I like watching romantic comedies, and wouldn’t mind watching it again even though I watched it before. I like watching korean/japanese drama. I like reading comics/anime. It’s my escape from reality.
24. I LOVE everything disney, I think they should hire me for promoting them or you know give me a free pass because I went there like really often and I’m not even in so-cal. I enter the sweepstakes all the time but never win :( Everything there just excites me. It is indeed the happiest place on earth! And I think one of the best gifts I ever gotten is 6 days tickets to disneyworld! Wouldn’t mind getting it again *hint hint* :9
25. and I am forever grateful for the cross. I can’t imagine my life without Jesus :] It is truly the greatest gift of all *blushed*

thank you for reading all the way to the bottom.. :]
Gosh! I wish I can do more than 25 :9

thank You...

Just a little while longer I wanna pray
Can't get You off my mind so I came to say:
Thank You Lord just for loving me
Many times as I do forget
Every need that You have met
Oh thank You Lord, I know You're showing me
You are there when I am down and out
You're holding me, Your love is so amazing
Oh it changed me

Here I am with all I am
Raise my hands to worship You
I wanna say thank you, oh thank you
For everything, for who You are
You cover me, You touch my heart
I wanna say thank you

I could have died in my sin but You saved me
Didn't have any hope at all
You gave me peace divine, strength to carry on
I should have been the one to pay
But instead You took my place
My Jesus, words cannot explain
Even though I don't deserve Your love for me
You look beyond my fault and You showed mercy

I wanna say thank you for the sun
I wanna say thank you for the rain
Everything You do is beautiful
I'm so grateful for Your love

*deep sigh*
*blushed* :`)

Too Blessed to be Stressed!

Hafta always, keep reminding myself on that phrase.
I'm feelin a lil' down again... :(
but again God has opened up my eyes and heart to my surrounding *blushed*
whatever I'm going thru right now is absolutely nothing to be complained about
Things are definitely not going my way now, but I hope it's going on God's way

I thank you for friends who share encouraging stories and a God who never give up on me :)
How can i give up on Him then...
*blushed* completely...

Learning to love, actually

I never thought I’d would struggle this much learning about love.
I mean: I thought of myself as “not-looking for trouble” kind of person and mostly kind and friendly and funny and yea :p
But the truth just opened up my eyes and my heart and I really am rebuked by it.
It’s actually a constant struggle for me.
If love is a course, I would probably flunked the test :(

Trust Issue

Yep. Start with that one.
The bible said on John 4:16 “so we know and rely on the love God has for us.”
Knowing is one but trusting is another.
Most of the time, I worry so much that I acted like an unbeliever :(
Worry = not trusting = not loving.

Habitual

Love should be impartial and consistent.
I love people that love me. Friends and family, I even called them my loved-ones. I love babies, there’s so adorable, what’s not to love about them. But what about the rest of the people?
I usually just ignore them before I make things worst. After all isn’t ignorance a bliss?
But ignoring = not loving.

Choice and commitment

It’s not simply attraction, emotion and affection. It’s devotion.
But most of the time I’m like a switch: on and off, on and off, on and off…
And on and off = not loving.

But I’m learning now.
And hopefully I can pass the final exam!
*blushed* :`)

New Year!

Gosh! it's 2009... already!!!
I'm not ready :'( i really wish i have a pause button .
I don't know what i'm gonna do this year. I don't have a plan and don't know what to plan.
And i thought by now i must've move on. But i stayed.
Help me God...

Today God reminded me about Abraham and his journey.
Pretty much like me, he was clueless and he had his down-time too.
He worried. He doubted. He failed. But he also rised, repented and faithful.
And God was with him the whole time he failed until the end.
*blushed* :`)

And God had to sent my friend to convince me because He knows i'm a "Thomas"
I got an email today on "Tips how to thrive on 2009":
They key is to focus on—and believe—God's promises.
Focus on God's promises . . . and you will thrive in uncertainty. Take your eyes off of them, and you'll sink like Peter on the water when he took his eyes off Jesus.

Tip #1: Take daily note of God's promises.
You can't live by what you don't know. You can't eat if you don't know where food is. Therefore, you should spend a little time each day of 2009 in God's Word so that He can remind you of who He is and what He will do for you and through you.

Tip #2: Believe God's promises.
"Believe?" In the middle of chaos or pain or worry? I know, easier said than done. But it must be done! When you read God's promises to believers—of provision when you're in need, of peace when trouble is all around you, of power when you're weak—you must dare to believe that He will bring them to pass in your life. And then . . .

Tip #3: Stand on God's promises no matter what.
Here's some advice from someone who's been there. Once you commit to trust in God's promises to you . . . you'll be tested and challenged. And when you stand firm, you'll become stronger than ever—2009 will be a year of spiritual fitness for you.
It's okay to acknowledge that personal challenges seem foreboding. But dare to believe God anyhow! If you do, you'll see how great our God is.

God promises He "will meet all your needs according to his glorious riches in Christ Jesus" (Phil. 4:19).
WOW! what do you say to that? i'm spechless
*blushed* :`) again.